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Dear
Expectant Parents:
We
know that this is a difficult time as you decide what will be best for
your child. We respect your
strength and courage as you go through this process.
We invite you to get to know us a bit through this letter; should
you choose our family for your child, we welcome you to be a part of
his/her life.
We,
Alasdair and Rudi, got married in 2001, after dating for about a year.
What drew us together initially were shared professional
interests; we met at a seminar on current events in Asia. Both of
our jobs involved international travel to different countries in
Asia, and we had a lot to talk about.
Alasdair is a professor at a local university, and Rudi worked
for a foundation that gives grants to nonprofit organizations to improve
the lives of people in Asia.
We
found that when we were not traveling, we both loved exploring different
cultures through music and food, and during that first year of dating we
got to know each other better while going to concerts and trying
different restaurants. We
also liked cooking together.
After eight years of marriage, these still are the things we most
enjoy doing together.
Alasdair (a Scottish name) is originally from New Zealand.
He grew up as one of four siblings in a small town.
He came to the U.S. to attend graduate school, and
ended up staying to teach at a university.
Rudi was born and raised in
California.
Her interest in her ethnic heritage led her to study, travel, and
work in China.
Despite our different cultural
and ethnic backgrounds, we share common values, including the importance
of family, personal responsibility, and compassion for others.
Early on when we were dating we learned we shared a vision of family
that included two children.
After marrying, upon learning of our infertility, we decided to build
our family through adoption.
Our daughter Annelise came into our lives through adoption from
China.
When we traveled to China to meet
her in May 2007, she was a healthy 13-month old.
Since then, we have taken great pleasure in discovering her
personality and interests.
Her generous and compassionate nature will make her a good older sister.
She loves music, dancing and looking at books.
She enjoys attending a nursery school just down the street.
 Our
home in the Washington, DC area is a two-bedroom apartment in a
cooperative apartment community.
We know all our neighbors in the building, and there has been
very little turnover in the years we’ve lived here.
Several of them have voluntarily come to babysit for us.
We love the neighborhood, a great one for raising kids; there are
many families with children here. We
have built up a good support network of friends and neighbors, and as
parents, we feel even more a part of our community than we did before.
School, several playgrounds, the
zoo, and a public library are all within a short walk of our home.
We
enjoy being parents, and share the responsibilities of parenting.
We feel that parenthood as a sort of loving adventure, one in
which we are all constantly learning about ourselves and each other.
We hope to raise our children to
be honest, respectful, open-minded, self-confident, responsible, and
sensitive to the needs of others.
We feel it is important to provide our children with educational
and creative opportunities, while being as supportive as we can of their
interests and choices. As a
biracial couple ourselves, we believe that children benefit from being
raised in an ethnically and culturally diverse environment.
The area in which we live has significant African-American,
Asian, and Latino populations, as well as a large international
community of people from different countries.
On
the weekends, we take pleasure in going for walks in the neighborhood
and in the public parks near us, trying different ethnic restaurants,
and visiting the many free museums in Washington.
We also really like seeing movies, including old classics from
the 1940s and ‘50s. On
Saturday mornings May through November, we enjoy going to the local
farmers’ market to buy fresh fruit and vegetables.
On Sundays we usually make pancakes and have them with fresh
fruit. We both like
swimming for exercise, and regularly go to the local YMCA swimming pool.
The biggest special occasion of the year for us has been our 2-3
day anniversary getaway; we have found some very unique and interesting
places to stay that are within driving distance from
Washington, from which we have explored the
historic sites, natural beauty, and food of the area.
 Although
our extended families do not live nearby, we feel that it is very
important to stay in close touch with them.
Rudi’s parents, sister, and brother live in
San Francisco, and since Annelise joined our
family, we have managed to see them every 4-5 months.
Rudi has two cousins who have also adopted children, so adoption
is not new to the family, and the adopted children have been warmly
welcomed. Alasdair’s family is
more spread out, and quite multi-cultural: his siblings’ families
include New Zealand,
Greek/Australian and African (Botswanan) families.
A family reunion is planned every two years or so when everyone
comes together. We traveled
to New Zealand
as a family during the end-of-year holidays in 2007 to gather with
Alasdair’s mother and siblings and their families.
When we can’t visit in person,
we visit by phone, internet video calling, e-mail, and letters.
We
are excited about fulfilling our dream of having two children through
adoption, and feel that we can provide good care.
One of the best things about teaching is that Alasdair has a
flexible schedule, which is helpful when bringing up kids!
Also, his employer will support 14 weeks of paid parental leave.
While Rudi hopes to return to nonprofit work eventually, she
feels fortunate that it’s been possible for her to be a full-time mom,
and that it will be possible to do the same for a second child.
Welcoming a child into our family through adoption from this country
means that we may have the important chance to know the child’s
birthmother/parents. Should
you choose our family for your child, we would like to get to know you.
We will make sure that your child knows as much about you as you would
like him/her to know. We
also welcome you to be involved in his or her life; we will respect the
extent of openness that you feel comfortable with.
Thank you for taking the time to learn about us.
We hope it has given you a sense of who we are as a family.
Whatever your final decision is, we wish you all the best.
Sincerely,
Alasdair and Rudi
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